Late Night Date

Last night, I had a lovely late night with Harlow. Weirdly enough, I'm not being sarcastic... it was lovely.

Harlow went to bed at 8:15 and woke up whining at 11:45. My first thought was "come onnnnn, you're fine. Go back to sleep pleaseeeeeeeeeee". I checked on her, she was ok, just needed to calm herself down. I talked to Michael and we decided to let her cry. I've let her cry many times and usually I'm ok and she settles down quickly. But last night, I was a mess. I couldn't handle it. I stood in her doorway and watched her try to settle down for what felt like an eternity. She never did.

Michael and I had agreed to let her learn to sooth herself, but this wasn't normal for her, and I just felt that she needed her mama for some reason. I was just standing in the doorway, and seriously- I felt like someone shoved me over to her crib like... what are you waiting for?! So, I snatched her up. When she wakes up for no reason, I'm usually frustrated. But not last night. I was so happy to have her in my arms. I didn't put her back down. I took her out into the living room and we rocked and snuggled until 1:00 AM.

She was wide awake. Just snuggling me and staring at me. It was so wonderful. I was having flashbacks of when she was a newborn and just trying to enjoy that moment because she's already getting so wiggly that she doesn't snuggle me very often. Cheesy? Yes. But it made me emotional and I was crying at how much I love this girl and no matter why she woke up, tummy ache, bad dream, missing her mama... I was happy to help her calm down.

I swaddled her back up, put her in her crib and she woke up happy and smiling at 7:15 AM. It was super weird for her to wake up at that time, so upset. So I took advantage of it. I secretly think she needed me because I needed her :) We were missing each other.

I just wanted to document that moment, and unfortunately I'm terrible at writing in my journal lately, so here it is on my blog.

So thankful for my new job as a mom.

Transition Time Again

Goodness sake, Summer flew by! I have been slacking on my blog again because that's what I do when I'm off having lots of fun. We finished off our wonderful summer in Oregon by taking an anniversary trip to Diamond and Crater lake followed by a week at Horseshoe Bend with my parents. It was a truly wonderful time. It was so fun to show Michael my favorite places on earth and he loved it just like I knew he would. It was so nice to end our fun summer with mom and dad by spending a week laughing and swimming and playing games and hiking. Many wonderful memories made for sure!

After all of this fun...the end came. SAD. This summer has been especially wonderful because Harlow has been able to play with Grandma and Grandpa every day and Grandma and Grandpa have been a HUGEEE help to this mommy. Saying goodbye was something that we hoped would never come, but sure enough, it did. The only thing that makes it all better is the fact that we had the best time and we will be back :) So, happy thoughts only!

Now, we're back in Utah! There is so much I love about being in Utah, like spending my days with Steph and Evelyn! And getting to snuggle baby Emmaline! My computer is giving me problems with those pictures from my phone, so I'll have to post those another time soon. But Evelyn and Harlow are so cute together. They smile and giggle and play together and share toys and pull on each other. It's seriously cute. Emmaline Grace is PERFECTION and I could stare at her newborn beauty all day. There is also so much that I DO NOT love about Utah. I've been back for a couple of days and I'm quickly reminded of why I can't live here permanently. So, I just plan to stay at the 4 plex and play with my best friend and her baby. That way,the Utah drivers and crazy people won't bug me, right?

This is Michael's LAST YEAR OF SCHOOL! And even though there are things I don't love about it here, I am going to soak up every minute because I know I will be sad when we leave.  He is finishing his Masters in Accounting and I'm so very proud of how hard he has worked to get to this point. 

Here are some cute pictures of Harlow recently. She is SO much fun right now. Rolling all over the place, giggling and growing like crazy! That includes her hair haha! She gets more every day, I swear. We adore her. I thank my Heavenly Father for her every single day. What a blessing she is. 

I'll be better at posting :)

Call Me Maybe

My niece and nephew, Ben and Bella, are visiting this week and we have had SO.MUCH.FUN. I just love these 2. Obviously, I always have loved them, but now that they are getting a little bit older, we have so much in common because in my heart, I'm still about 15 years old. So, we spent our week joining the Call Me Maybe craze! We went all over town shooting our music video and it has been a blast! I am so thankful that I was here this summer to spend this week with them. We've made some great memories! So, enjoy. :)

Venting.

Well, I am sure that everyone has thoughts and feelings about the recent tragedy in Colorado. I am sure everyone has been saddened and has strong feelings about it. I do as well and I just need a place to express them. So, my blog is the place.

I almost don't have the words to express my horror. I was up early feeding Harlow when I heard the news that there was a shooting in a movie theater and 12 people had died with dozens more injured. Tears instantly came. I felt as if I was in there. I felt as if someone I loved was in there. I felt like I knew those people. And unfortunately, I mostly felt anger and fear. I cannot really get over those 2 things yet. The evil in this world is quickly becoming more than I feel I can handle. Don't get me wrong, I realize that I live a blessed life and there is a lot of good and joy in the world. But, the evil in the world seems to be showing its ugly head a lot more than I can bare.

There is always terrible things on the news, and this was just the last straw. I now feel this terrible feeling in myself that something bad is going to happen and I'm just walking around waiting for it, trying to avoid it. I feel like I need to always be looking over my shoulder. I hate this. That is so not me. I am an optimist. The innocent people who were hurt in this awful incident were normal people like me. They were going to a MOVIE for heavens sake. I can't get it out of my head. What normal thing will I be doing when something unthinkable happens?

Luckily, deep down in my heart I do know that people are good. I know that there is so much good in the world and that I can cling to those things. I know that I can fight these feelings by trying to be a force for good in the world. But for now, it's all very fresh and for some reason, it has upset me so much.

Lastly, my knowledge that we have a Heavenly Father with a plan is the one thing that gives me peace. He does not make mistakes. I know that Jesus Christ has felt every single pain of those people who have suffered and every sorrow of those mourning.

Just typing all of this out helps. I have had a million thoughts flying around in my head. "Why do I care so much" being the main one. It feels good to sort it all out for a minute. But as I type this out I realize that I need to learn a lesson from this. Life cannot be taken for granted. We must be a positive influence on the world while we can.

What was I gonna' say?

Hello! I hope everyone had a safe and happy 4th of July. We sure did. We walked the Butte to Butte this year and had a great time with a picnic afterwards and a firework show from Michael at night. We are finally getting some sunshine around here and it feels wonderful. We're taking Harlow out on a picnic today so she can actually learn what the sun feels and looks like! All throughout the week, I think about things that I want to blog about and then I sit down to type... and it's all gone. I forget! Darn it, well- until I remember, here is some pictures of our recent happenings. 

  

 Harlow is rolling over now. SO CUTE! She is super into her toes and her hands and she is working reallll hard on getting her binky in her mouth all by herself. I never get sick of watching her learn and play every single day.

Decisions, Decisions

As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I believe in modern revelation and that we have prophets and apostles today that receive that revelation for the whole church. I am FAR from perfect at following all of their council, though I do try. Michael and I have had to make some tough decisions, and we often turn to our Heavenly Father and the council of our prophets when making those decisions. This is one example of a talk given that rang crystal clear to me. I pray, honestly pray in my prayers that others can understand this philosophy and support us, as we have counseled together. Sometimes even things that we want and that are really great things, are not realistic at the time. I included the link to the talk if you're interested in reading it, and I included some of the quotes that provided answer to my dilemma. Hi-lights added by me. 

Provident Living  by Elder Robert D. Hales

"All of us are responsible to provide for ourselves and our families in both temporal and spiritual ways. To provide providently, we must practice the principles of provident living: joyfully living within our means, being content with what we have, avoiding excessive debt, and diligently saving and preparing for rainy-day emergencies. When we live providently, we can provide for ourselves and our families and also follow the Savior’s example to serve and bless others."

"I have learned that the three most loving words are “I love you,” and the four most caring words for those we love are “We can’t afford it.”"

"There is an equally important principle underlying these lessons: we can learn much from communicating with our husbands and wives. As we counsel and work together in family councils, we can help each other become provident providers and teach our children to live providently as well."

Hello Again!

As expected, summer has brought us a lot of good times so far. The only word we can use to describe our lives is: BLESSED. Michael is working at his internship and loving it. I am staying home with Harlow and loving it. We're still up to the same ol' stuff. Visiting friends and family and getting really excited to make Oregon our permanent home. Time is flying and Harlow has been disobedient and keeps growing when I tell her not too. Naughty. 

Michael blessed our pretty little girl on June 3rd. Michael's parents, Darren & Jill, Marc & Connie, and Anessa came for the occasion. It was beautiful and wonderful. She wore a perfect dress made by her Grandma LeAnn and it was a very special day. We had a great visit with all of our family and are so thankful for their support. Shout out to my mom who was terribly sick and still managed to throw a great party and be a wonderful hostess. Love you mommy. 

Moss Adams has assigned Michael to some clients in Portland, so he is spending a week at a time up there this month. Harlow and I went to join him for a couple of days last week and had tons of fun! We got to go to Caleb's pre school graduation, baseball games of Kellen and Caleb (SO ADORABLE), had an adventurous day downtown with Anessa, and stayed in a fancy pants hotel. It as a lot of fun!

 Immediately after that fun week, we went on to our family reunion in Rockaway Beach, OR. We lucked out and got 2 beautiful days on the Oregon Coast. It was so so much fun! I loved introducing Harlow to her extended family, people who are very special to me. We had a lot of fun eating and laughing and catching up with everyone. Harlow's favorite part was getting to spend time with cousin Ivy again. They miss each other terribly when they are away. It's so adorable to watch them do all the same things. Emily and I were quite a pair, always nursing and changing bums together all weekend haha!

 

 And that's HELLO from the Woodmansees for today.I love reading all of your blogs, so keep posting! Life is a constant adjustment with an infant. But it's an adjustment that I wouldn't trade for the world.